All across the world a pandemic has stricken our fine canine friends. They are being turned into metro-Barbie dogs at unprecedented rates. Typically I’m not one to decry a person’s freedom of expression, but the time does arise when we should stick up for those with less power and ability.

An alarming trend has occurred as stores nationwide are carrying a new line of “Puppypurses” along with the old standard Dolce and Gabbana handbags. If you go to a strip mall you may see one Paris Hilton, or her clone army, slinking pet kinkajous in these things.